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Things That Make My Day: Bad Lip Reading

Christmas has either come early, or Santa just dropped off a belated 2014 present, because Bad Lip Reading: The 2015 NFL Version has just arrived!

This is the third installment of bad lip reading for the NFL, and they have all made me crack up! I always mercilessly make Paul and my co-workers watch these. But now, I will share this with you.

I can’t explain it. There are plenty of people out there who I am sure will find these stupid and ridiculous, but I can’t help but laugh so hard.

Enjoy, my friends, and thank you to those who have brought this into my life.

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http://bleacherreport.com/articles/2338922-bad-lip-reading-returns-with-a-hilarious-2015-nfl-version?utm_source=facebook.com&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=programming-national

Marriage Does Not an Adult Make

Flash back a few days to me scrolling aimlessly through Facebook. My attention was caught by a sweepstakes to win a designer wedding gown, and not just any designer, but Monique Lhuillier, for the love of all things white and lacy. Of course I clicked the link to enter, and I realized that all I had to do was start a wedding registry with what happened to be one of my favorite home-good stores, and I was in the running for my dream gown. (Mind you, I couldn’t currently tell you the name of a specific Monique silhouette that I love, but that is beside the point. I have never won anything; this just seemed like a great way to avoid homework. There, I said it).

Seeing as Paul and I are at about the time frame when we need to start a registry, I figured, “why the hell not?”, “How hard could it be?” I thought, as I dove into casual dining collections, bakeware and cookware, cutlery, and bathroom essentials. Not going to lie… three or four pages in I started to freak out and found myself reaching repeatedly for my glass of wine. Did we really need new measuring cups? What about fine china? How many place settings? I HATE gravy! Will I ever need a gravy bowl? Where do I even start?

“Start with what you know” I found my own PR voice in my head whispering as I tapped a finger on my wine glass.

On my wine glass…

It was so simple…

I clicked on “glassware” and went straight to the wine glasses. I may not know if I need fine china, but I know for sure exactly what I DO need:

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Olivia Pope wine glasses. Wine. Solves. Everything.

Many people seem to think that getting married is some sort of gateway into adulthood. False, my friends. In fact, I feel less like an adult, because I have someone else who is technically responsible for my well being. Guess who is going to make sure I make it to the end of the day alive? My hubs. Not that I am taking this as an excuse to be reckless, but the immature side of me feels like now I have a tag team member to be twice as immature with.

Just because I am getting married does not mean that I know how many place settings I am going to need or what all those insane torture devices are in the baking section of Bed Bath and Beyond. I haven’t grown up; it just means that I have found someone who legally wants to be bound to my childlike ways.

I am hoping I don’t feel like this if we ever have a child. Like “hey, we added a third member to our idiot mob!”

In the mean time, let it be known that the first thing that I registered for were red wine glasses, a la Olivia Pope… followed by champagne flutes. Eight of each, because that just sounded good.

I can grow up next year 🙂 And I will ask Paul about the gravy boat. He likes gravy.

I Do Believe In… A Practice in Things You Believe In

Happy MLK Day, everyone!

A fun post from The Lady Oakie just hit my inbox, so I decided I would participate.

I realize it is a far cry from the dreams and beliefs that Dr. King stood for, but I appreciated the post, so here we go. Feel free to post your own and link up below!

I Believe….

You should ALWAYS give a wave if someone lets you into a lane or does a kind gesture on the road. ALWAYS WAVE. I don’t know why, but when someone gives me a wave, it can make my day. I always wave. In fact, I always say “thank you” aloud, as if that other car can hear me.

Animals have souls and distinct personalities. Domestic or wild, animals are way smarter than people give them credit for and can communicate at higher levels than I think many people believe.

Some songs can make everything better. Try being in a bad mood when your favorite “dance it out” song comes on.

Life is too short and the world is too big not to explore. We weren’t meant to stay in one place.

Mistakes are only negative in a sense if you don’t learn anything or if you repeat them. 

Negative people will only drag you down as far as you will let them.

Bread pudding, rice pudding, chocolate pudding; all some of the best desserts ever.

There is beauty EVERYWHERE in this world, it is just up to you to see it.

Hope everyone is having a great day!

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Who Doesn’t Love a Fresh Start?

Happy January 2nd everyone! A January 2nd post is way less cliche than a January 1st, New Year’s post, right? Probably not so much, but we are going with it anyway.

I have always loved the start to a new year. Who doesn’t love a fresh start? Sure, it isn’t like all of your problems dissipated into thin air once the ball dropped, but there is something about the calendar starting over that makes people think that things can be new again.

I am one who is extremely susceptible to the romanticism that is the new year and a fresh start, but there is something about 2015 that has me especially excited. I had a great 2014, but I have big hopes and plans for this year, and am feeling refreshed and ready to get back to the things I love; particularly running and writing, and possibly even tackle a few new passions and challenges.

For starters, my poor blog needs to stop being ignored, and I need to be more diligent about following all of the amazing people I have connected with through WordPress. You all inspire me so much whether it be with your running, writing, or creativity. Just exposing myself to all of this more will help fuel my writing again.

As far as my running goes, I am already signed up for two half marathons this spring. The Illinois Half Marathon on April 25th, and the Indianapolis Mini Marathon on May 2nd. This should set me up for a fall marathon (fingers crossed) come the fall. I might even add the Chicago Triathlon in August to my list.

How about you guys? What are your goals and hopes for the new year?

I have plenty of personal and professional goals as well, but I am still hashing those out. I think there is always room to be a better person , and I am sure 2015 will award me plenty of opportunities for growth.

Happy New Year everyone. Let’s have an amazing 2015.

Cheers!

P.S. A little MSU, Big Ten Cheer for everyone out there. Probably the best football game I have ever seen in my life!

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You know what is terrible for blogging? And Some Self Love

Graduate School!

Life has been so busy, and so exciting, but I am neglecting my corner of cyber space here.

So what do I bring you, dear readers, as a gift from being gone for so long? How about some good old fashion girl power?

It sounds cheesy, but I have been seeing loads of “empowering” campaigns for women and have been inspired by Jennifer Garner and her “baby bump admission” and pizza-eating acceptance speeches. If you have time, you should give both articles a read if you haven’t already.

In the first article, J. Gar defends the pregnancy rumors explaining that after having kids, her “baby bump” is there to stay. The second article is FANTASTIC! While accepting an award at Elle’s Women in Hollywood Celebration, she points out how insane it is to have a night to honor “51% of the population”, and noted how differently she and her husband are questioned during press junkets.

“Isn’t it kind of time to change that conversation?” she said during her speech. I couldn’t agree more!

This takes me to my next point:

Having a slew of single male friends (and female friends, but this weighs heavier toward the male side) I am so sick of hearing about “she’s not that hot” or “she had a decent stomach” or “I’m sure she’s nice, but…” Don’t get me wrong, I am all for taking care of yourself, but we need to stop equating a person’s value with the shape of their body, and I am speaking mostly toward the beauty industry and how women are portrayed.

I was so excited when i discovered the Stop the Beauty Madness Campaign which is focused on social change. (And I know there are more out there like this! E.g. Dove)

“Enough of the impossible standards. Enough of the “ideal” image. Most of all, enough of the feeling of NOT ENOUGH when it comes to your own beauty. There also comes a time when an entire culture of women have had it. When blogs and ad campaigns and AS-IS selfie pictures start to change the rules of the game.

That time is now. That culture is this culture. “

Some times, men don’t seem to understand, and say that we put this pressure on ourselves as women. It is up to us to feel good about ourselves, with that I don’t disagree, but I think there should be a supportive culture behind us letting us know that it is ok to be all different shapes and sizes. Being healthy is beautiful, being strong is beautiful, being smart is beautiful, and being confident is beautiful. None of these come with sizes or measurements.

Can’t that simply be our message?

Do you have a favorite message or campaign about beauty?

March on, fabulous readers, with confidence in who you are and in your individual beauty!

Shutterfly Coupon for The Gallery Wall Project

To say that Groupon has some what fueled our social lives since moving to Chicago would be an understatement. We have gone golfing, enjoyed an amazing prohibition tour through the city (which deserves it’s own post) dined out, and decorated our new place.

Imagine my glee when I discovered that Groupon now does coupons! I was so excited to see there was an offer from Shutterfly because I have wanted to develop some of my own photography to use on a gallery wall I am (pitifully) attempting to put together.

With a 45% off coupon, I was able to upload my photo to Shutterfly, edit it as needed, and five days later, I got my orange package in the mail with my fabulous canvas.

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So, we continue to piece together this “gallery” wall:

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It is a fun work in progress that can easily be shifted, but for right now, I kind of like the unconventional-ness of it 🙂

Hope everyone is well, and I will have more next week. I am off to Long Beach to stay on the historic Queen Mary for a night!

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72 Hours of Engaged Bliss and Already….

Type A Gemini twin and panic are setting in. (Side note: this will NOT be turning into a wedding blog, but you will be hearing about it on occasion.)

We are not concerning ourselves with a massive, go for broke, traditional wedding.. though those are beautiful.  We want something relaxed, laid back and all about our friends and family (not to mention we have two years to plan). I am noticing that even those have plenty of planning that goes into them and hundreds of things to think about.

Thankfully, I am surrounded by wonderful friends who have done this before and are willing to lend a hand, and I refuse to lose my sense of humor and focus on what a wedding is about in a pile of linen choices and flowers. BUT, I ask you, dear readers: To those who have been married before, what piece of advice would you go back and give your newly engaged self? 

Peace and blessings! Momma is headed out for a fabulous run tonight since training for the Chicago Marathon starts next week!

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You’re welcome

Is this Real Life?

Let’s just take it back to Friday when I had to drive to Chicago for an interview.

I was extremely excited about this position: PR for a start-up in Greek Town that produces premium, 100% natural, human-grade dog treats called Lincoln Bark.  The thought of doing PR for a start-up is a dream to me, especially a company like this with so much potential with a product I believe in!

I immediately fell in love with the owner, and we sat and chatted for two hours. She offered me the job on the spot, but it was only for two days a week.  I didn’t think 1. that would be nearly enough time for me to accomplish what the company needs and 2. that wouldn’t be enough money for me to live on.  This was a great opportunity though!  She told me to think about it and talk it over with Paul.

Saturday morning I sat down to write her a thank you  note when my email dinged.  It was an email from her offering me the position again but for full-time! After a super quick chat with Paul, I accepted!  

We then got ready to head out to our “Preakness Stakes” themed going away party, hosted by our dear friends.  All (well most) of our closest friends were gathering for one last soiree to give us a send-off. It was perfect!

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You can’t have a party without cheese…

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My handsome man!

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You also can’t have a party without puppies

About an hour and a half into the party, the hostess called everyone into the living room to give a toast.  It was so great looking around at all of our closest friends and having them there with us… weird that they ALL had cameras, so I was feeling a little awkward. Then Paul said a few words telling our friends that they were our family and our home. Paul then said I had exciting news to share, so I told everyone about my job, I toasted to full-time employment and thought we were done when suddenly Paul said, “and there is one more thing”, and proceeded to drop to one knee and pull out a ring.

This is probably the part where you want to hear the sweet words he said and how I started to cry… but no, that would be too easy for us.  Paul was immediately bombarded by the 3 golden retriever puppies that were in attendance, one which was trying to eat the ring. I blacked out and didn’t hear anything he said, but proceeded to flap my hands like a mad woman and call him an asshole because he had tricked me and said he wasn’t going to propose anytime soon.

Thank God I stopped my hands long enough and shut my mouth to hear him say, “will you spend the rest of your life with me?”, and I slid my puppy drool lubed ring on my finger and held on to a tiny shred of romance by hugging and kissing my fiance. 

How amazing to have all of our “people” there. It was a dream of mine to have our engagement happen like that and it was perfect.  People really only remember the dog and the asshole comment, but it was perfectly us, and we got to spend the rest of the day with everyone celebrating.

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Dinner post going away/engagement party

There are better pictures that I can post later, but all I can say, in the most cliche way ever, is that I am the luckiest girl in the world!

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P.S. Holy shit, I’m a bride….

Adventures in Detroit!

Detroit gets a pretty bad rap from most of the nation, and most of Michigan; me included sometimes. 

Having grown up in a suburb of Detroit, I was fortunate enough to go to the Detroit Symphony, Tiger’s games, hockey games to cheer on the Red Wings, the Fox Theater and other little Detroit treasures.  As an adult, though, short of the occasional Tiger’s game, I never go to Detroit, and I never really want to… Until I met my new co-worker Dana who lives in, and LOVES, Detroit.

She planned a Detroit day for Paul and me so that we could see Detroit through the eyes of a natives.

We started with coffee at her amazing loft which is right across the express way from Comerica Park and Ford Field and then made our way over to Eastern Market.

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Detroit skyline

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They had the most amazing flowers!

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I thought this couple selling bread was just too cute to not take a picture of.

We then headed across the street to grab brunch at this great little place: 

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They had so many great options and most everything is made from local goods, plus it is cafeteria style seating, so you can make some new friends. How many people would have guessed that there were places in Detroit to get a vegan waffle? 

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So good!

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Then we headed to Dana’s boyfriend’s building.  It is a former Model-T dealership in Cork Town that he is renovating.  The place just reeks of history and has the most amazing details! A tin ceiling, tiled floor, and two roof spaces for amazing views of Detroit.

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Ambassador Bridge from the roof top

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Michigan Central Station. It is abandoned now, but is still a gorgeous piece of architecture.

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The site of the old Tiger’s Stadium, now used as a park.

The second floor of his building is his living space, and is the coolest loft style space I have ever seen. So much potential!

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This doesn’t do it justice

We met a woman who rents a small retail space in the building and grew up in Cork Town.  It was amazing to sit and listen to them talk about the history of Cork Town like when the Tigers won the World Series in ’84 and when people were bused into downtown Detroit when mental hospitals were closed around the state.  You get a whole new appreciation for a city when you get to spend time with people who love it and are investing in it.  

Our last stop in Detroit was Slow’s BBQ (for a vegetarian, I end up at a lot of BBQ places).  It has a great reputation, and speaking only on behalf of the beer, service and mac n’ cheese, it was amazing.

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And one last look at Michigan Central Station:

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Detroit may get a bad rap, but there is tons to do in this city and lots of life thriving in it.  It’s not out of the woods yet, but Detroit will have better days again.

(sorry for the terrible photos, I forgot my good camera at home)

Sangrias and Ball Gowns

Saturday was an official “spring day” here in Michigan, so Paul and I headed to Grand Rapids to meet up with some fabulous friends of ours, Doug and Samay, to enjoy the city’s best sangrias at San Chez:

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What an eclectic place! Amazing food (I had vanilla, maple steel-cut oats), free-spirited atmosphere, and the sangrias were to die for!

After breakfast, the boys headed out to visit all of the local breweries while Samay and I chatted and finished off 2 pitchers of sangrias. We have officially launched the tradition of Sangria Saturday.

What else are 2 girls to do on a glorious spring day in down town Grand Rapids after inhaling that much sangria? Shop of course! 

An hour of meandering the shops and streets, Samay wanted to go look at a jewelry store which so happened to be located right next to a bridal salon. Samay dragged me in… I didn’t want to be the “yet to be engaged woman looking at dresses”.  But I was welcomed with open arms, strong arms, that before I knew it had me in a dressing room. 

“Ok, one dress” I said to myself. 

The first dress was an A-line Lazaro that looked gorgeous on the mannequin, but quickly turned into a taffeta monster once I started to dive into it. I swear to God, I thought it was going to eat me alive. It was ginormous, uncomfortable, and I felt like a massive cupcake. 

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This is dress 1. Not me in dress 1 of course. I almost wish I had allowed pictures so you could all laugh along with me.

You know what isn’t fun? **TMI ALERT***Trying on wedding dresses when you are 40lbs over weight, hung-over, haven’t washed your hair in days, on the 2nd day of your period and pretty sure  you need to change your tampon, and needing to poop.  Oh yeah, how is that for the bridal glow.

When I got the first itchy monstrosity off of me, they had 3 more in the dressing room waiting for me. So picture me in the dressing room in a Target bra which didn’t match my polka dot bikini briefs and green and white striped Michigan State calf socks…. unshaven for many moons.  SEXY.

My second dress was a hideous beaded corset top with another A-line skirt. Just no.

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These dresses don’t look like this on normal people with a top knot and no makeup.

As I sauntered gracelessly back into the dressing room, trying not to trip on or rip my third massive gown, the sales woman says to me, “You don’t wear dresses often do you?”.

I raise an  eyebrow at her, because this is the most absurd question I had been asked all day. “What do I look like, a Disney princess? No, I don’t frequently wear ballgowns”.

The fourth dress was actually a surprise to me.  It was a trumpet silhouette and was the most flattering of them all. Not hating it aside, I denied their request for more dresses and raced to the dressing room to escape, passing another incoming bride who was ecstatic to try on dresses.  From the looks of her, not only did she have the bride gene, but she wasn’t hung over, had washed her hair and had probably shaved her legs in the last 2 weeks. I was more than happy to tap her into the “master bridal suite”.

Note to self: prepare for a trip to a bridal salon by shaving, wearing cute underwear, doing your hair and makeup, but never forget to always: 

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And really, at the end of the day, I’ll have fun getting married even if I’m in sweatpants and a hoodie (which I assure you I won’t be).