humor

The Beauty of Getting Older

I just read a joke in Reader’s Digest at my allergist’s office, and I proceeded to sit there and giggle for a half hour.  I giggled while walking to my car, and giggled all the way back to work. Once at work, I laughed so hard, I could barely recite it to my co-worker.

What was the joke, you may be wondering?

-“What did one snowman say to the other?”

-“I smell carrots, too”

And that has had me laughing for almost an hour now.  I can guarantee that I will have the same outburst of laughter when i attempt to tell it to Paul tonight.

I love this about myself.  I find humor and joy in the simplest things (eg: this joke).  It is something that has only gotten worse throughout the years, and I believe it to be part of the beauty of getting older: being able to see the humor in things. 

Thus far, I have loved aging. I am not afraid of getting older, or going gray or wrinkled.  Growing old is a privileged, and I am eager to discover what each year of life will teach me. 

Just starting the last year of my twenties, I feel so much more confident in my own skin (though I am at my heaviest weight.  I am more focused on being healthy).  I am more aware of the value within myself, and know myself better than I ever have.

Scars, beauty marks, mistakes from our past, walls we have bumped into; flaws on the surface and below, they are just all part of the process.  I like to think of it as “earning my stripes”.  This past year, I gained three new scars from my surgery which have turned into red lines on both sides of my lower-abdomen as well as a big red dot on the upper-inside of my belly button.   A few years ago, these may have bothered me and made me self-conscious, but today, I don’t give them a single thought.  

They help tell my story, and will continue to do so for the rest of my life.  The beginning of laugh-lines and crows feet that are forming will only get deeper each day with every smile and every giggle, and I love that.

Don’t be afraid to get older, and don’t be afraid to earn your stripes.  Each year that passes is just another year to learn to love yourself more, and hopefully find the humor and beauty in everything.

I am excited to get to know myself more in this last trip around the sun in my twenties.  My thirties will just be a whole new chapter in earning my stripes, and I am sure, laughing at the most ridiculous things.

“The world does not deliver meaning to you.  You have to decide what you want and need and must do.”

-Zadie Smith

So this is the story of Paul and Steph trying to put up their Christmas tree…

Paul cautiously retrieves the tree from the shed where I stored it and didn’t properly tape the boxes up… but we proceed because we are just so damn excited to get our tree up: 

I then realize that Paul, always having real trees, doesn’t know how to fluff a branch:

Then Paul’s suspicions come true when we discover that some crafty squirrel has made tree box #1 its food storage unit:

upon realizing this, we also realize that our tree has been predecorated in squirrel shit.  The call is made to throw the tree out.  Win for Paul, we are getting a real tree.

Well done, squirrel, well done.

And of course I made Paul put all of these back outside by the shed for the poor squirrel that we took them from.

Oh, Merry Christmas world…

So this was my morning:

I am the new owner of an iPhone thanks to a water attack I launched on my Blackberry night before last. Yes, I spill even in my sleep…

So anywho, last night, I set the alarm on my new phone, and slide off into my restful slumber.

On Fridays, I need to be into work at 7am, but as I opened my eyes this morning, not to the prompting of an alarm, I just knew that it was right around that time. Sure enough, with a glance at my watch it is 6:56.

“SHIT!”

I throw the covers and pillows off me, no doubt hitting Paul in the face, miss-step getting out of bed, tip into my bed-side table banging it into the wall, and then I manage to stumble over cat and dog into the bathroom to try and get my life together.

Thankfully I was smart last night and piled my clothes in the bathroom so that I could avoid waking up Paul… which I’m sure was a failure after yelling expletives and banging furniture.

I do my best to cover up the gross “Wrath of the Titans” blemish I have going on right in-between my eyes, throw my hair back and race downstairs. Feed cat, grab purse, grab phone, my workout clothes for later, and race out the back door, locking it behind me feeling pretty good about the 6 minute get-ready pace I had just accomplished….then that feeling was shattered with the slam of the locked door when I realized that I failed to grab my keys.

I have uttered exactly 4 words out loud at this point, and none of them are appropriate for primetime television.

We don’t have a hide-a-key, and all doors are solidly locked. Our dog doesn’t bark, and in fact is still sleeping with Paul, so my options are to either break in or somehow get him to wake up.

I call his phone, but we both sleep with our phones on silent, so I know that it is a lost cause. I decide to try and throw stones at our bedroom window closest to him, but there isn’t a lot of room on that side of the house. It is basically a narrow path that separates our house and our neighbor’s driveway, but I hauled off and launched a rock at the window anyway. Making a meager noise, it bounced off and made an even louder noise hitting the windshield of my neighbor’s car.  With a “deer in headlights” glance into all of their windows, I make sure that no one saw or heard before I dart off behind our house.

Plan B: bang loudly on the back door… which was pointless seeing as there is no way he would hear me all the way from the back door, through the kitchen, living room, up the stairs and down the hall way… did I mention that he also sleeps with a fan set to high right next to his head?

Plan C required me to get creative. I needed to throw something non-destructive at the siding on the other side of the house, where the window is in the closet, but a direct shot to his ear, opposite the fan. I remembered that we had a lacrosse ball in the yard, so after scouting it out, I proceeded to hurl it at the siding right next to the window. I couldn’t throw it at the window seeing as it was open, and knowing my luck it would have gone straight through the screen.

4 shots in, while semi-yelling his name in hopes of it being loud enough to reach Paul, but not our neighbors, his face appears in the window.

My favorite part is that he looks at me and just says, “Yeah?”, as if I might be out there for some other reason than needing his assistance. “Oh just down here for some off-hour, romantic gesture… I locked myself out.”

I don’t know why this poor guy stays with me…. every day is like an adventure with the chronically hazardous, and he is always there to fix whatever I have gotten myself into.

He’s a good guy 🙂 And somehow, I was only 20 minutes late to work.

Until my next hazard…

Had a sushi date last night at the restaurant where we had our first date.  We happened to be seated in the same spot as we were that night, but this picture was a new addition there.

The waitress came up to our table and said, “Isn’t this the cutest little lovers’ corner?”

Paul’s first reaction was to say, “She’s my ex-wife”

You would have to know our sense of humor, but I just cracked up.